What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I'm getting married
To pizza
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize