we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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