I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
