hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
