What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
