Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
