Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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