I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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