Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
