Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I would ride that face into the sunset
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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