return my video game
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Are we still banned from the library?
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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