so explain again why im purple
no
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
