fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize