Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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