Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
