I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
