Its about making memories worth repressing
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize