tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
