Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
