and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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