Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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