he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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