There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Randomize
