i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
