Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
