we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
