Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize