...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Randomize