i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
