fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
