Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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