look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize