DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
