hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
