There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
