She said her name was "party"
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
