3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
