So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
and i looked up. we had an audience...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
