She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i just google imaged poop.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
the room spins SO much faster in panama
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
