you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I think your dad took our porno
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize