Have you finally orgasmed yet?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
he laminated a picture of his dick.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
