why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
The adults are the big ones right?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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