I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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