come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
