Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
