I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Randomize
