i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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