Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
