hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize