what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
