addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Acid is not a monday night drug
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
My dad just said "fuck circus"
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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